i want to have a baby

[watslove]

hi!
I want to have a baby. but the doctor told me that I can't have one now. If when, he doesnt know yet. It is because of the condition of my kidneys. I feel sorry for my husband because I know he wants a baby too. We are just married and we want to have a family. I am still undergoing pulse therapy and it will take up to 2 years!!!! I feel like I want to die. Pulse is making me more sick!
my husband is not favor with taking alternatives. But for me, Id rather take food supplements because I know, it helps me a lot. I really find it hard. I feel like I am deteriorating. I always get sick, and so easily because I stopped taking supplements. i don't know what to do.

[dawnholmes]

hi
i was told that i had 95% chance of never becoming a mom :( ,they say 5% is good but weve been trying for 2yrs now and got know were, i also feel sorry for my hubby, it makes me sad to see him holding other children and not his own,and that his mother is always on about children, what makes it worse his brother and wife has just had a baby so all we get is baby this and that it drives me mad sometimes, so i do know what it feels like. i hope you get better soon take care

[Clare.T]

Hello watslove

I am very sorry for all your suffering right now but I hope that you will find comfort and reassurance here. Maybe some helpful treatment tips too.

About having children : first I don't want to give you false hope but Cytoxan doesn't always lead to infertility. From what I have read, younger women are less affected; second ( talking about the reality not the emotional aspect), your own health has to come first.

Try to focus on what you are dealing with right now, getting the lupus and kidney disease under control - find out from us here if you are getting all possible help dealing with the side effects of the Cytoxan. Anti nausea meds and plenty of fluids afterwards.
This treatment does help many, so keep the faith that you will be one of those.

Also find out if you are getting optimum treatment options. I notice for example that you are taking 10 mgs Prednisone a day. I have the notion that many people get IV steroids at the same time as the Cytoxan but I could be wrong.

About your idea of taking food supplements as disease treatment.

It is certainly a good idea to eat a well balanced diet avoiding processed foods and additives of any sort, very low in animal fats but enough 'good' vegetable oils ( maybe an omega 3 supplement), no added sugars, with plenty of fresh fruit and veg.
You will feel better in general for it, but as for relying on this to treat kidney disease you really would be seriously risking your health and your life. That's just my opinion but I think it is well founded.

If that is what you have been doing up till now, it doesn't seem to have been very effective, to be perfectly blunt.

You are dealing with a great deal right now and also it seems the prospect of a move to the UK ? This sort of move itself is very stressful even when there are not serious health concerns.
Obviously and understandably, there is a very anxiety level in your current situation. Stress doesn't favour healing and recovery. Perhaps you can consider taking some medication, anti depression /anti anxiety type, to give you greater peace of mind and strength to deal more calmly with all that's going on right now and to worry less about the future.

All the very best

Clare

[Helena669]

Hi Watslove,

Im going through the diagnosis stage re the lupus/random auto immune disease. Im also desperately trying for a baby, and have just had some standard fertility tests done by the GP which have shown that Im not ovulating and I have low progesterone and high pro-lactin levels.

All of my friends either have babies or toddlers or are pregnant, and its a really horrible feeling.

Im going to ask my GP tomorrow for private referrals to St Thomas' but the thing im really interested in is the alternative stuff, and what seems to be really helping is acupunture. I dont know how is works, but I think it is helping, and my cycle seems to be regulating. I wondered if you have tried anything like this, just to help with general wellbeing? My acupunturist works on my immune system as well as my reproductive system, and he is a qualified doctor in china, and understands everything I tell him about lupus symptoms, etc.

Always check with your doctor first, as I didnt talk to my GP before I started, and she was really funny about it and challenged me, but I need to feel like Im doing something, and I have a lot of faith in it.

I know about the deteriorating feeling, Im trying to make more time for me, even if its just to relax and to try to deal with stuff less emotionally, but its not always that simple, and it feels like a lot to deal with on my own, but some days are better than others.

I hope this helps, good luck

Helena

[Clare.T]

Hi again Helena

I think it's an excellent idea to ask for referral privately to St Thomas' to see Dr Hughes. Assuming he wasn't the one who gave you the brush off last time ! :)

Dr Hughes is retiring from NHS practice very soon but i have the impression he will remain in private practice. I had a very good impression of Dr D D'Cruz when I went there for continuing care - he certainly listened.
I got a print out of blood tests and he went through them with me. I couldn't have asked for more.

The high prolactin is found in women with lupus but I don't know what other conditions it is found in.

Cheers

Clare

[loz82]

Hi watslove

i kinda know how ur feeling, i really want to have a baby sometime in the future, people keep telling me im only 23 and got loads of time but its not that that worries me.

i just feel like everything is against me having children, 1st of all i have sle and risk of bloodclots so therefore ridk of miscarridges, i have diabetes - so risk of abnormalities (and now they are saying risk of being stillborn babies for people with diabetes) on anticonvulsants that i cant get pregnant on, so will have to come off those and a few years ago i was put on an anticonvulsant that wasnt meant for young women and my periods stopped and everything - i wasnt ovulating (sp?) the dr says he can check this but will have to come off the pill etc and overall; it will take about a year for everything to get back to normal.

But i wont give up, when i decide the time is right 4 a baby i will try my hardest to overcome everything, good luck

loz
uk

[tlb33]

HELLO.
I WAS TOLD ABOUT 3 WEEKS AGO I HAVE A 7.6 CM MASS ON MY UTERUS AND THE FIRST THING THE DOC SAID IS HISTORECTOMY AND I AM LIKE IS THERE NO OTHER OPTIONS MY GOD!!! I ONLY HAVE ONE CHILD AND WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A DAUGHTER SO I WENT TO ME GYN. AND HE SAID SINCE I HAVE SLE AND THE MASS HE RECOMENDS NO MORE CHILDREN AND HE STRESSED THAT . IT HURT MY FEELINGS SO BAD I WANTED TO CRY . HE SAID IT WOULD BE A HIGH RISK AND COULD CAUSE KIDNEY PROBLEMS AND HIGH BLOOD PRESURE BUT I REALLY WANT A BABY . HE PUT ME ON A LOW DOSE OF BIRTH CONTROLL SO I WANT HAVE HEAVY BLEEDING ON MY PERIODS AND BAD CRAMPS.