[Marika]

Many of you know my parents have died within 9 months of each other. I had been looking after them but as I live in Germany and they lived in Uk. it was hard going.
Now I have just got back from clearing their house out ( I didn't finish it in 3 weeks)
It was the most stressful , disstressing time for me...I felt as if I was prying into thier personnel affairs, reading their letters ect. I had to go thru everything as they hadn't thrown anything out in 60 yrs.But finding all the little things my parents had kept from me...presents I had made them when I was in infant school, paintings when i was in high school. Diaries..some of my old clothes that they loved...things that they had kept for me....
I would find an old tatty plate or mirror , only for it tobe wraped in newspaper but one from a collectors newspaper so telling me don't throw this away its valuable. My father who was Ukrainian..all his papers from the war his odiesy (splg. srry) on trying to get thru europe and not tobe sent back...photoes who are these people on the photoes with him..why didnt he tell who they are, are they relatives????
All the draws and cupboards are empty, my husband did most of the throwing away...and one day he said there's one thing i can't throw away. it's hanging in the cupboard I thought he was being sarcastic opend this empty wardrobe and there was my mums favorite dress hangong there alone.....I don't know how I got thru the 3 weeks.
Then I went to visit a girl friend in Leeds who has just got the O:K: after having gone thru chemo ect for breast cancer....raining in Uk. of course so we went to an outlet shopping center...well i can only say the best shopping partner is one who has just had cancer...we came out staggering with bags ect and laughing..i turned to her and said how much i had really enjoyed my day, best day for a long time....I swear I heard my mum say GOOD.
Then she said why don't you stay another day or two...I thought yes I can I don't have to worry about my parents waiting for me...now don't get me wrong I would take all the stress aagain and again just to have them back for one more day. But we all if we are lucky like me...have to say goodbye to our parents I was lucky to have them so long. but i'm glad I've got it behind me....and please any of you horders out there don't leave it all for your kids to sort out PLEASE
May your God go with you.
Love Marikaxxx

 

[Katharine]

Hi Marika,

It's good to hear from you again That can't have been at all easy but I'm glad you were able to go and do that healing shopping trip. A bit of retail therapy now and then does us all a bit of good.

I won't hoard. Leaving my ex rather "fast" and having only 2 hours to move out my stuff taught me that a lot of things suddenly weren't very important though I must admit to being a little sad that I no longer have any of the boys' baby clothes that I had kept, little shoes, even their photo albums...

hugs :hug:

Katharine

 

[macfamily53]

Hi Marika

I am so sorry you had to go through so much stress lately but very glad you are out there trying to have friends to have fun with.I do know what you mean about glad to have the stress gone but would most ceertaintly take your parents back to at the same time.i lost my mil recently and am trying to take care of my fil now.he has gotten real bad sicne she passed away which makes sense after 61 years of marriage for them.he is missing her for sure but so afraid he is not going to last long.
Well anyway i sure hope you can enjoy some time now doing what you love to do the most whatever that is (((hugs))).

Tammy

 

[helloos]

Hi Marika

I am sorry you had to go through all of this and I do understand how very hard it is. When you said you almost could hear your mom say "good" for having a good time, you were right. As parents, we want our children to be happy and having fun and living their life. I always tell my children I would never want to know they were alone or crying in their bed, etc. after I am gone, I would want them to live, laugh, and enjoy life. So know in your heart that this is what your parents wanted for you too. They were very lucky to have you and you them. Hold that dear to you and smile, live, and enjoy life as much as you can.