[jackie j]

Hi Everyone,

I haven't posted for a while, been around reading every day. Just didn't have the energy to reply to any post. If any of you can remember in July I started having iron infusion due to me having extremely low blood. I have sle, hyper thyroid, fibro, diabetes, high blood pressure, My meds are cozaar 100mg, methoformin 2000mg,plaquenil 400mg, flexeril 10mg, protonix 40mg, folic acid 1mg synthroid 75mg

The infusions worked up until this month, was called by my GP last week. My blood once again has dropped to 9.5. I'M once again feeling very weak.

I'm very depressed about my whole illness. It is becoming harder and harder to keep up with my full time job and my 4 kids. I have 1son in his last year of college and one son starting this fall. My third son will be starting 10th grade and my baby girl will be in the 6th grade this fall. I don't think i can continue to be a full time mom and work full time and keep up with all the sports activities and band performances and loads of different practices. I'm also a restaurant manager for a busy campground

I think I have worked myself down to the ground. I’m sorry for whining and complaining but i just don't know how much longer I can continue on this path. Can anyone tell me or point me in the right direction of how they balance work and managing a home? Then to top it off I’m a neat freak so my house has to be in order. Thanks for listen to me look forward to any advice you can give. I forgot both my doctors want me to file for disability.

 

[sunflowergirl2]

:sad:Jackie, you have alot on your plate!!!!!!!!!! Hard enough for a healthy person:hug: and not a lupie. I gave up the "clean freak" housework along time ago. It still bothers me, but I know I can't do it anymore. Do you have any help ? I hired a cleaning woman and that helped alot. You're entitled to whine! That's why we're here. HUGS!!! Cathy

 

[Clare.T]

Jackie, you have your answer staring you in the face. The plain fact is that very sick people cannot combine work, family, a very busy social life, keeping an immaculate house and taking on multiple other commitments. The super women we read about in the papers have masses of help either paid or a network of friends and family. Whatever hype you hear on the media, that is a fact

Something has to go. I am sure that your family would rather it was not you!

Take care of yourself and focus on your health. That is the only thing that matters right now and in the long run. Nobody is remembered for being a perfect housekeeper.

Hugs
Clare

 

[Merle]

Hi Jackie

You are such a hero - but no longer seems to be working for you. I've been there - and ended up with the decision to stop work made for me when I had a sudden physical breakdown.

It would have been so much better (for my health and everyone around me) if I had planned the reduction of my commitments, rather than having it forced on me.

I don't know how important (financially / emotionally) your work is to you - but maybe you should explore working part time - if not ceasing work altogether - sooner rather than later. If you discuss your situation with your employers you may be able to negotiate a short sabbatical and/or working part time - at least for a few months - to give your health a chance to improves. If this does not bring about an improvement - you may have to consider going on disability.

Let us know what you decide.

Take care.

Merle

 

[dixy]

Hi Jackie

SUPERWOMAN. Just jump off the merrygo round and stand still 4 a moment take stock of your life. I have 5 kids all grown up now but I was superwoman till sle. stopped me in my tracks, my body let me down badly(could hardly move)I also am a neat freak obsessive at times, but had to let go. Its hard but in the end u have no choice its taken away from u.

 

[dixy]

ME AGAIN HOPE THIS HELPS U

Topic: Mayonnaise Jar
Posted: 19-March-2009 at 11:41am
When things in your life seem, Almost too much to handle,
When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
And had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
And proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students, If the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured
them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.
He then asked The students again
If the jar was full.. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand
And poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded
With an unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced Two cups of coffee from under the table
And poured the entire contents Into the jar, effectively
Filling the Empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor, As the laughter subsided,
'I want you to recognize that This jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - God, family,
children, health, Friends, and Favorite passions -
Things that if everything else was lost
And only they remained, Your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter Like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else --
The small stuff.

'If you put the sand into the jar first,' He continued,
'there is no room for The pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time And energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for The things that are
Important to you.
Laugh, Love, Live

 

[jackie j]

Thank You All,

I just love this site you have become my second family. I have decided to insist that we have a cleaning woman come at least twice week. I also decided it is time for me to take sometime off work.

I'm looking into a leave my job offers FMLA. I will admit i cried after reading all your replies. I showed them to my husband and he said "wow that is amazing how much love was felt from your replies. Thats a big step for him.

I just want everyone to know i pray for everyone here and just want to say thank you all and many many hugs goes out to you all.

 

[onetay]

Jackie,
Hi and I am sorry that things are interrupting your normal life. I hate to be the one to tell you this but you are doing too much. How would I know because you sound just like me. You could drop a few hours and cut a couple of activities. I know this is not the news you wanted to hear but that seems to be the answer for now. Once you get things back in control again then maybe you could over weeks return to your normal active life.

Sometimes our bodies are trying to tell us something all we have to is listen to it. It does seems like yours is talking to you but you are unwilling to listen to it. As with anything modiration is the answer to a well balanced life. Lupies can not be super women, something we all have trouble with it seems lol.

I do hope that you find a happy mediun that you, your body, and family can live with. Be well first and work second.

 

[sheila t]

Hi Jackie, I had to give up work 11 years ago, it all got to much. I used to worry about the house so much, now I do what I can. Just wanted to send you a BIG HUG

Sheila x

 

[pollianna]

If I didn't have to work I would give it up in a New York minute. I am stuck tho and I too had a complete physical breakdown that left me bedridden for 18 months. If you can afford it financially give it up, walk away from work and don't look back. your family are more than enough to be looking after.

Sometimes we get so caught up on the hampster wheel and rightly become agreived that this illness takes away the things we feel we should be able to do. Sometimes we need to loose a battle to win a war :hug:

 

[earthling]

Hi Jackie, I'm glad you're taking a break. You should be taking care of number one - you! Working and stress is what got me sick in the first place. Stress place such a huge role. Take the time to take care of yourself, eat well, rest well...take good care.

 

[mississippi girl]

I was in the same boat there for a while, my husband along with my children (11 and 8yrs old) have taken over most of the house hold chores. I make more money than he does and we need two incomes just to maintain at the moment. He is being wonderful he cooks and cleans and allows me to rest every chance I can. He takes my daughter to softball practice and takes care of everything they need ( and they are not his children). If it wasn't for him I do not know how I could continue to work.

 

[sushi]

i know exactlly what you mean. i used to be superwoman myself, work, clean take care of my children until one day i got really sick. i think i got sick because i put everybody first and i was always last.

it has certainly changed i no longer put me last. i make sure that i get enough rest before i can take up a task. even though i used to be a clean freak i no longer am it doesnt mean that my house is dirty. i get everything done but not in one day the way i used to.

i agree with clare take care of yourself first. then take care of everyone else
your health is the most important thing right now.

 

[jackie j]

Thank You All,

I have cut done on work and some of my chores at work. I have hit rock bottom now. I'm extremly exhausted. Im presently on bed rest. I just wanted to Thank everyone for their concerns and advice.

 

[keebler]

Hi Jackie,

I am glad that you are taking steps to rest more.
(((Jackie))) lupus fatigue is awful. It is like you have hit a wall and you are down.

Love,
Lyn

 

[elle-co]

I am so glad to hear that you are in bed taking it easy. Fatigue is simply awful:worried:. Hope that you are feeling better soon, until then continue to take it easy.

Hugs
Elle x