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You've taken a good first step by coming here - there is a lot of information and support and empathy. Many good ideas too, and many (((hugs))).

As for what to do... try to let your doctor know how bad you are feeling. Physically and mentally. Long lasting physical pain would get anyone down, and the worries and stress of living with lupus and all the unknowns can contribute. Lupus itself can affect the brain causing depression or increased tendency to worry, etc.

It is possible that medications for lupus can be adjusted or changed and this will help reduce the lupus specific issues. Counseling or medication for depression can help too since it does sound like depression may be setting in as well. I personally LOVE cognitive behavioral therapy - helps with learning how to live with a chronic illness in the best way possible. Heck, it would help **anyone** live the best life possible! Many people here find antidepressant medication very helpful.

Let me know if you have any more specific concerns, and I'll try to offer up something else. Hang in there - you've dealt with this a long time. You've had better times in the past than now - and they'll come again. One last tip, is I always make sure to do something each week that I really enjoy and really want to do. Whatever that is. Sometimes it's laying in bed watching a movie with hubby. Sometimes it's going out to eat, or out to a movie. Sometimes it's visiting horses, or getting my nails done. Maybe just a bubble bath, etc. Try to do somethings each week that you LOVE and appreciate each moment of doing that thing.

Take care...
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