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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Moderators if I have put this in the wrong place I am sorry wasn't really sure where to put it.

I was diagnosed with "mild" Lupus in 2007 and feel on the whole I cope well. I have days like everyone when I wonder why me... I am now starting to worry about a friend of mine. Funny thing is when I was diagnosed she thought lupus was something that was made up for House MD! :hehe:

When she tells me how she is feeling it is me all over again about 5 or 6 years ago. She gets a lot of back and muscular pain, sore throats that go on for weeks at a time, horrendous migraines, she gets a red "butterfly" type rash on her cheeks that flares and then settles. She says she is constantly tired and is now (I think because of the pain) having sleep disturbances. The other day she said the only thing that wasn't hurting at the moment is her feet and hands!

My question is how on earth do I say I think you should go an see your doctor and get tested. Her GP sounds like a bit of a numpty to be honest, but I really don't want her to have to go through all that I did, and then feeling like a failure because you make mistakes cos you are so darn tired

Any advice would be gratefully received...

Claire
PS I have a copy of Talking about Lupus, maybe I should give it to her
 

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Hi Claire,

I guess I would come right out and tell her what you are thinking. When she brings up the subject would be a great way to tell her what you think. I am a point blank sort of person.:p I don't like beating around the bush. :hehe:

Maybe her telling you how she feels is her way of wanting to see what you think? Honestly you know her and how she will react. She knows what you deal with on a day to day basis.

Take care and let us know how your friend is doing.

Love,
Lyn
 

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Hi Claire,

I think I'd be pretty direct as Lyn says and say to her that auto-immune diseases are so vast and complex that they are well worth ruling out.

Katharine
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thanks Lyn and Katherine, I have spoken to her once or twice but she tends to tell me more if we are chatting on another friends type website. Maybe next time she tells me how she is feeling I will suggest she talk to her GP about auto immune tests there are a million and one things it could be. Like I was, she is reluctant to start taking pain meds, but as I have said to her that she probably would feel a little better if she actually felt more "comfortable".

I will let you know how I get on....... Wish me luck xx

Claire
 

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Dear Claire-
It sounds like you are dealing with a tough situation. I think suggesting to your friend she seek medical advice is a good idea. In the UK can't you go directly to a rheumatologist without a referral? I would say "it sounds like you have some symptoms similar to autoimmune symptoms and should have it looked into." You don't like to see her feeling so badly. I hope all goes well for your friend and she starts feeling better soon. Please let us know how everything goes.
Rose

P.S. Best of luck
 

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Hi, I hope that your conversation with your friend goes well. I am sure she will appreciate your concern.

Deb
 

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Hi Claire, I agree with everyone else and tell her what you may think.
Also have her see her GP for bloodwork and go from there.

Remember, a friend will tell you what you need to hear and not what they want to hear.
I really hope your friend gets some answers soon.
Best wishes to both of you! Tc and be pain free!

Hugs! Your friend , GSD77...Laurie :):)
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Well after months of talkin and suggesting she really should have a long conversation with her GP I think I might be getting somewhere.... I have pointed her to this site and hope that she does some digging for her self.. I will keep you updated

Claire
 

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Hi Claire... wish I had had a friend like you last year when I was in so much pain and getting no answers. She is lucky to have somebody so knowledgeable as a friend onboard, I always am safe in the knowledge that none of my friends have a clue!!! She will want to be more comfortable and get to a better place of that I have no doubt.. best of luck!;)
Claire XX
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
She did say last night when chatting online that she likes to talk to me cos I am the only one that understands and doesn't think she is "putting it on or lying". I am glad she can come and talk to me. I told her to talk also to our female patner at work. She herself has arthritis in her knee and has had many problems and understands the disturbed sleep because of pain and the fatigue that can go with it. I hope that she finds an answer. I did say to her that "I'm not saying that it is lupus but there are other immune mediated things it could be" including MCTD or fibro.

She doesn't want to rely on drugs and I can totally understand that, I didn't even.... but I wouldn't be without them now.... I prefer to be in less pain thank you very much:lol:

Claire
 

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It is good that your friend has you to talk to. Hopefully she will have a look at the site and it will help her, gain the confidence to try and get some treatment.
 
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