hi all,
i'm planning on getting pregnant soon (in the next few months) and i've seen the high risk obgyns, who treated me like a fricken guinea pig and tried to scare me, with things such as shadowy statistics (that were even mentioned above). a few things i heard at this visit:
docs: "we want you to think about this really hard, you could shorten your life span"
me: well by how much are we talking here?
doc: i don't know, i'm not a statistitian....
doc: well, there are other options...
me: i doubt adoption is an option for a working class family where i'm unable to work consistently
doc: well, if you want a perfect white baby...
me: that has nothing to do with it.
i'm thirty, and my lupus has been fairly under control for quite a long time, other than the normal fatigue and joint pain, which my rheum isn't too concerned about.
my whole appt there led me to feel as though i was a lupus patient who just happened to want to be pregnant, and not a women who wants to be pregnant who happens to have lupus. i understand them wanting to cover their asses because of liability and i understand, that, them being a teaching hospital and all, that i'm a fascinating experiment, but i was stressed out for an entire MONTH following that visit, which seems to me to be no way to spend a pregnancy.
i have found some midwives willing to (god bless'em) work with me and my rheumatologist on a home birth with the understanding that if something goes wrong at any point during my pregnancy, i will OBVIOUSLY go in to appropriate medical care. i guess i just want to be treated with some respect and would like people to assume that my pregnancy will go well, with the understanding that it may not, instead of assuming that because i have some medical label, that it will be horrible. such assumptions!!!! I'd like to work with someone who trusts my body before they suspect it...
after my venting, i'd like to ask, is there anyone on here who had a homebirth? a midwife? gave birth at a birthing center? what were your experiences of birth--hospital or otherwise????
help!!!!:worried: i'm so very frustrated and i need some support
much love,
sarita
i'm planning on getting pregnant soon (in the next few months) and i've seen the high risk obgyns, who treated me like a fricken guinea pig and tried to scare me, with things such as shadowy statistics (that were even mentioned above). a few things i heard at this visit:
docs: "we want you to think about this really hard, you could shorten your life span"
me: well by how much are we talking here?
doc: i don't know, i'm not a statistitian....
doc: well, there are other options...
me: i doubt adoption is an option for a working class family where i'm unable to work consistently
doc: well, if you want a perfect white baby...
me: that has nothing to do with it.
i'm thirty, and my lupus has been fairly under control for quite a long time, other than the normal fatigue and joint pain, which my rheum isn't too concerned about.
my whole appt there led me to feel as though i was a lupus patient who just happened to want to be pregnant, and not a women who wants to be pregnant who happens to have lupus. i understand them wanting to cover their asses because of liability and i understand, that, them being a teaching hospital and all, that i'm a fascinating experiment, but i was stressed out for an entire MONTH following that visit, which seems to me to be no way to spend a pregnancy.
i have found some midwives willing to (god bless'em) work with me and my rheumatologist on a home birth with the understanding that if something goes wrong at any point during my pregnancy, i will OBVIOUSLY go in to appropriate medical care. i guess i just want to be treated with some respect and would like people to assume that my pregnancy will go well, with the understanding that it may not, instead of assuming that because i have some medical label, that it will be horrible. such assumptions!!!! I'd like to work with someone who trusts my body before they suspect it...
after my venting, i'd like to ask, is there anyone on here who had a homebirth? a midwife? gave birth at a birthing center? what were your experiences of birth--hospital or otherwise????
help!!!!:worried: i'm so very frustrated and i need some support
much love,
sarita