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hello everyone (warning - long post)

First, I hope that you are all ok and I miss you all very much. My apologies that I haven't been able to come on here and catch up but I always keep all of you in my prayers.

I hope that one day soon I will return and be able to talk, respond to some posts and I miss it alot.

Things are not good rigtht now. Very severe personal problems with my son. So that I have been trying to keep my strength up for. Also some mental issues with one of my sisters who is leaving aweful screaming and yelling messages on my machine and quite disturbing. I think I will have to unplug my phone as I can't take it anymore. I just want my family to leave me alone right now.

But besides all of that, and I think a lot is due to the lack of sleep from such disturbances and stress on top of it all, I am not in good shape and may be going to the hospital.

I cannot bend my elbows. My eyes were swollen again this morning. The pain in both elbows are severe and stiff. My ankles are quite painful and my hands are somewhat swollen. I have deep bursitis in my hip which I am being told I have no treatment option right now for it. My fevers are spiking up and then down. I have this sharp stabbing pain in my chest wihich hurts when I breathe and think pleursiy is going to be the outcome of it. My body is stiff and hard to move and walk. My palpitations in my heart feels like a rap song. I couldn't sleep last night and went to take a sleeping pill and forgot I had no more. I don't take often so totally forgot that one. I couldn't remember if I took my morning pills or not, so decided don't take them because of overdose. So I am almost sure I missed all those doses.

My advice about the pill box, didn't take my own advice, and had no energy or strength to separate them, so I do this to myself.

I can't lay on my side because of the hip and pain in chest is on the same side, so laying on the opposite hurts the pleursy, that is why i think that is what it is.

I am going to really try to hold out and see if I can make it until Monday, but that brings me to missing work. Also, the hospital emergency room is not a place to be this time of the year. The flu is around and I expose myself to more problems by sitting there and waiting for hours under the florescent lights just turns me off from the idea. But the shape I am in, I might have to take that chance and go tomorrow.

Anyway, I am sorry for the rant but I am alone right now and needed to complain I guess. I can't call any of family right now because I set myself up for misery if I do. My husband is away working the day and my oldest son came in hugged and kissed me as he saw the shape I was in, but I don't like complaining to him ! So my apologies that I loaded this on you! But you are my second family and know you won't mind !

Again, I hope that you are all ok and I'll let you know should I go to the hospital.
 

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Hi Paula,

I think you're right and it is high time that you go to the hospital. It will also remove some of that stress and provide you with a chance to sleep a little. I think that is long overdue.

I hope it goes well. And, don't worry about work, it really isn't the most important thing right now,

hugs :hug:
Katharine
 

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((((((Paula))))))

Oh my goodness what an awful time you are having. I'm sorry that the situation with your son is no better. I know how hard you have tried to make time for yourself and rest during all this upset - I've admired your strength and faith through it all.

I do think you need to get to hospital as soon as possible. Once you are seen then they can assess what treatment you need. Explain to them about your light sensitivity and maybe they can see you sooner or do something else to minimise your exposure. Do you have a rheumy you can call?

I know your hubby worries about you greatly, is there someone else that can go with you to the hospital? Please don't suffer any longer as you are Paula.

I'll be thinking of you :hugbetter:

Hugz,

Pam xxx
 

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((((Paula))))

I agree with the others, you need to go to the hospital and get taken care of. You need to think of you and get care that you need.

:hug::hug:

Lyn
 

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((((((Paula))))))

I agree with the others - it's time to get yourself to hospital. We shall all be thinking of you and I shall keep you and your family in my prayers.

Much love to you

Judi xx
 

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hi Paula,

Just want to let you know that i am also thinking of you too. Please take the others advise and go to the hospital dont wait things can get worse very quickly.


Remember you need to take care of you before you can take care of others.
you will feel much better once you get the treatment that you need.

You know thats why i like this site we can all come hear and rant all we want
we get the understanding and answers we need so quickly from so many caring people on this site.

so rant away my deer rant away itll make you feel better. i hope you feel better very soon.:) :)
 

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Hi Paula,

Things sound bad - please visit A&E to get some professional care!

Wishing you all the best and hope you feel some relief soon!

Love Lesley
 

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HI paula

Hi paula i would say same as the rest get seen i know all about the pain of bursitis as i am having terrible pain in my right hip i am still in agony and thatis after having the injections for it i am having a horrid weekend hope you feel better send you my best wishes :) elisabeth
 

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paula just wanted to send you a ((((((((((hug)))))))))

take care of you
Lin xx:hug:
 

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((((((((Paula)))))))). I agree with the others, you must get medical care soon. Pluerisy is nothing to mess around with, and the other problems you are having with your joints aren't likely to go away on their own.
 

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oh paula, i am so sorry to hear that you are going through all this.
please please get yourself to the hospital and get yourself checked out.
love and lots of hugs

elle
 

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:there: Paula

Of course we don't mind you off-loading here...that's what we are here for.
I hope we can support you as much as possible :hug:

Paula I agree with everyone else you really should go to the hospital..please let us know how you get on.

I am so sorry you are going through so much :sad: I hope everything eases up for you very soon.
sending you lot's of love & strength
:grhug: karen x
 

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Paula,

Thinking of you and hoping you get some medical treatment soon. Please take care of yourself!

As Im sure you know, you should never feel bad for venting or unloading here, we are all in this together!

Sharon
 

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Wow, hugs to you, and I'm with the others. Hope you made it there okay and you're getting the treatment you need. It can be all too consuming when we get so sick and can't remember things. When I get like that, I keep a daily log of my meds, vital signs and track my symptoms per my docs orders. Please keep us apprised of how you're doing. Will keep you in my thoughts. And, I hope you turn the corner and get better soon. Hugs.

Love -- SusieBB
 

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Oh dear Paula,

Did you make it to a doctor over the weekend or today? Please let us all know how you are doing, and you come here and vent whenever you want girlfriend. We are your second family - we can't come over to be there with you, but we are always here if you have a need.

Sending you prayers and warm thoughts .... Be well!
 

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Paula,:hugbetter:
I want you to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. I know what you have gone through and I don't want you to suffer anymore.
Please let us know how you are.
You can always come here to vent, my friend.


Hugs,
Becca
 

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Hi Paula

Just wanted to send you some loving support and understanding. It feels very safe to rant here, so don't ever stop.

Do get yourself to the hospital and if at all possible don't let your family give you any more grief. Take great loving care of you. :hug:

Gentle hugs and sending vibes of strength, good health and support. :sunny:
 

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Discussion Starter #20
Thank you all so much for allowing me to come on and rant and rave and let frustrations out and for mostly caring so much.

I got in to my doctors (gp) yesterday and no did not go to the ER. I have had too many unpleasant memories of the ER and they never really help and seems like a waste of time and money at times.

But my gp said it is pleurisy and my gallbladder felt a little enlarged. He wanted me to do ultrasound and said since I don't have any other symptoms of gallbladder maybe just inflamed like everything else. He was concerned about the elbows not bending and swelling other places.

He first wanted me to call rhemo and I explained how it is 45 minutes and costs $50 to go there and skeptical about the steroids and as he saw the things that happened last time when on them.

He understood that I needed someone there inbetween my visits if it can be handled at his office.

So he put me on Indocin I believe. Anti inflammatory for the pleurisy and the joints. If by Wed. it is not better that I am to do ultrasound and call rhemo. I talked him into that one as I don't really want any unecessary testing done.

I hope and pray that it is better by tomorrow. But only have 2 pills into my system and no change yet. Don't expect miracles though.

Knowing me, I will probably give till the end of the week and see what happens.

I am cutting contact right now with certain family members as it is bringing way to much stress to my front door and cannot do it right now. I love them all dearly but no one seems to think how it affects my body. Tough choice but need to do it.

Thank you again for the get well wishes and I hope to be able to come on and chat soon.
 
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